RARE Blood Tests

So, in an effort to {potentially} find out why my beautiful embryos didn't stick around, we're running a series of rare, expensive blood tests this week:

ETA (Embryo Toxicity Assay)...$260: to find out if my "serum" contains toxins that cause embryos to stop growing and die.  HOLY COW.  We're hoping this comes back negative.  If not, I will have intravenous infusions (that last several hours) that begin before my FET and go through week 34 of pregnancy.  WOW.  This one gets sent off to Chicago tomorrow morning.  We'll get the results in about 2 weeks.

RIP (Reproductive ImmunoPhenotype)...$265: IF this test shows that my white blood cells are actively seeking out and destroying foreign material (aka my sweet embabies), I'll have a NKA (Natural Killer Cell Activation) test...$340.  Again, this is treated intravenously and will be sent off to Chicago.

I'll also be heading to Quest this week for the following tests:
Ana Screen
Cardiolipin Screen
Lupus Anticoagulant Evaluation
Rheumatoid Factor
Thyroid Peroxidase and Thyroglobulin Antibodies

We're hoping and praying that ALL of these tests come back negative and that we're good to go for our April FET...

ICLW February

Hello visitors!!!  Happy ICLW.  You're catching me at a rather shitty time.  WELCOME.  Glad you're here, put up your feet and stay a while.  May I offer you a drink?  Well, I'm having one.

You see, if our first ever fresh IVF had worked, I'd be 5 weeks and 1 day pregnant.  My hubby and I just went through a "perfect cycle with imperfect results" and we're slowly recovering.  Gotta say, we were pretty cocky after we retrieved 22, 17 were mature, 17 fertilized and 2 perfect grade A blasts were {ever so smoothly} transferred in.  At 9dp5dt, I had my first blood test: BFN.  We were crushed.  We're regaining our strength and beyond grateful for the 10 snowbabies we have awaiting us.  We so desperately want to be their parents.  More info on our scheduled FET to come...

Thanks for stopping by!  I love writing and this blog is my "secret" outlet.  The true, empathetic support here is second to none.  I appreciate each and everyone of you.

WTF Appointment

Well that BFN came out of nowhere...{as an eternal optimist} I was CERTAIN this infertility blog was about to get a baby overhaul.  I was getting the hells outta here.  NO SUCH LUCK.  You're stuck with me.

My WTF appointment with my RE and embryologist is scheduled for Wednesday afternoon.  Word on the street is that for a mere $5 grand, we can turn this sucker right around and give it another go next month.  GOOD LORD.  I am in NO position to be making those kind of decisions right now.  I'm relatively new to the world of IVF and had no idea that you could immediately follow a huge fail with a FET, just like that.  The only thing that should follow a failed IVF is vodka...or Hawaii. 

The good news?  Today is better than yesterday which was a hell of a lot better than the day before.  Oh, and my hubby never ceases to amaze me.  Maybe I am a little lucky...

I want to say a HUGE thank you to all of my readers.  On Wednesday you were swearing right along with me and I appreciate you!  Thanks for the comments.  xoxo

It DIDN'T Work

I could tell by the tone of Dr. P's voice, that it was a "no".  I didn't even ask for my beta.  No more patches.  No more progesterone.  Such a loss.  The pain is indescribable.

1st Beta TOMORROW

Never thought I'd make it to my 1st beta...but this time tomorrow, I'll know {something}. A month ago, I wanted to fall asleep and wake up on the 15th. I couldn't bear the thought of waiting for this moment.  I thought it would never come.

As far as IVF cycles go, mine is pretty ideal so far and I'm beyond grateful. Does good luck come in 5s? Lord, I wish I knew. Only time will tell (and, of course, a blood test may help out too...perhaps).

Symptoms in my 2WW (some may be due to PIO): light to medium cramping off and on, some foods taste funny, intense dizziness when going from a seated position to standing and fatigue.

Good luck to all of the girls getting their betas this week.  I'm cheering for you!

OBSESSED with Success Stories

So...I've been quiet. Here's what I've been reading (admittedly more than once over) to keep the positivity flowing.  My first beta is Wednesday morning (holy cow!!!).

Check this link out:
Fertility Community IVF Success Stories

Comment with the following if you have an IVF or FET success story to share!
Age:
TTC for:
Diagnosis:
Prior ART:
# IVF cycles:
Donors:
Meds taken:
# Follicles at ER:
# Eggs retrieved:
# Eggs fertilized:
# Days b/w ER and ET:
# Embryos transferred:
Embryo quality:
2WW symptoms:
#dpt +BFP:
#dpt +HPT:
# at first beta:
# of babies:
Anything else you would have wanted to know before you started this process:

We Have SNOWBABIES

It's been quite a week.  We retrieved 22, 17 were mature, 17 fertilized, we transferred 2 grade a blasts and now have 10 snowbabies!! We are very fortunate. The other 5 stopped developing (and I cried for them...twice). Maybe it's the new estrogen patches (or the monotonous bed rest) but I'm a weepy mess today.  Hoping my sweet embryos are snuggling in for the long-haul...

PREGNANT Day

We did it! Embryo transfer has come and gone and we're exhausted...what a day full of roller coaster emotions. Whew!!

How did it go? After a long awaited, much anticipated Valium, things were looking up. Our precious embryologist greeted us with a hug and was thrilled to share the latest about our growing babies. She said that we're going to have several to freeze and won't ever need to go through stims again (bold statement, I know). All 17 of our little guys are still going strong. 9 of them are ahead of the pack and are high grade blastocysts. The other 8 are just a step behind but still look great. We transferred 2 grade A blasts and got to meet them just moments before. Now I know I'm biased but they were simply beautiful...and they're a part of us. Does it get anymore amazing than that?

So, now what? We wait...we pray...we hope. For all I know, this may be the closest I get to being mom. I'm going to cheer these kiddos on with all I've got, make them feel loved and take care of them to the best of my ability. I want this so badly I can hardly stand it.  Stick sweet babies...I love you already!!

So, I guess it's FINALLY true...I'm PUPO.  Our 1st beta is on the 15th!

It's TRANSFER Time

Tomorrow at 1:00 Central, I'll be officially knocked-up (via 5-day transfer)...for the FIRST time. Yep, it's time to pick up the kids and bring them home. My head is exploding as I'm attempting to sort rational from irrational thoughts. I'm cautiously optimistic. I mean, at least we'll be more pregnant than we've ever been before, right? Here we go...

Fertilization REPORT

My cell phone rang at 8:51 this morning (earlier than I expected). It was Dr. Z, our embryologist. I'm pretty sure I wasn't breathing...in fact, I know I wasn't. My classroom was full of kindergartners excited to celebrate the 100th day of school. Regardless, it was a Zach Morris moment: time stood still.

Dr. Z said that out of the 22 retrieved, 17 were mature (1 more than we were told yesterday)! She ICSI'ed all 17 and...wait for it...wait for it...100% fertilized!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was in shock. I couldn't even cry. I thanked her no less than a dozen times in our 3 minute conversation. We have SEVENTEEN embryos.  WOW WOW WOW WOW WOW. 

Our transfer is scheduled for Monday morning and we're hopeful!

Sweet SIXTEEN

Well, 22 to be exact...but we got 16 mature eggs!!  We are beyond grateful for such a successful retrieval.  This could be {quite possibly} the best birthday present EVER.

We drove downtown bright and early this morning for our 6:15 start time.  My nurse took my blood pressure, temp and weight and walked us back to our room.  I changed, donned my FABULOUS striped knee socks and gown, took a few pics (okay, a LOT of pics) and signed more consents.  My anesthesiologist came in, introduced himself and complimented my airways and veins (behave, sir).    Moments later, my nurse came and got me and I hugged my hubby good-bye...it was go time.

I walked across the hall, climbed onto the table, got an IV (ow)! and the rest is history.  Actually, the rest is that I love anesthesia...I mean LOVE.

After about an hour of digging around in my ovaries, we were done.  They wheeled me back into my room where my husband was waiting.  What was the first thing I asked?  C'mon, you know...how many???!!!  I teared up each of the EIGHT times he told me.

After catheter removal, Coke, Chee-zits and a delightful small, white narcotic, the cramps began to subside.  I was wheeled down to the car and we headed back home.

What now?  We wait...we pray.  Our little eggies are being ICSI'ed this afternoon.  We'll find out tomorrow morning how many fertilized and tomorrow afternoon if we'll do a 3-day or 5-day transfer.  To be continued...

I appreciate all of the well wishes...this group of someday mommas is the best!